The best number the kingdom has posted yet — Lil' Bo landed 3.34, Mode's 2.98 — but the pretzel-bun contender came up short of the 4.00 a Crown demands. Strong bun, standout mouth feel, and a patty that mostly delivered; it was the architecture that let it down, with patties reportedly going cattywompus across the table.
The docket called Slabtown, and the kingdom answered. A proper bar sandwich, start to finish — with a fourth stop the laws never saw coming.
The night opened at Loco Boys, wound through the pretzel-bun verdict at Slabtown Burgers, and settled in for the reckoning beneath the moose at Sleder's — the oldest tavern in town. Then a handful of the Kings pushed off from shore and closed the night in the bay, off the Maître D's boat, in the dark.
Two things for the record: the Commissioner was absent — though a burger still found its way to his doorstep — and the kingdom hosted two guests from Atlanta, Georgia, the first ambassadors from the South to break bread with the court.
Butcher paper on the patio tables, seasoned fries dumped out for the taking, plastic cups going around. And per the fourth law — while the eating happens, the burger does not exist. No talk, no scores, no debate. Heads down until the last wrapper is grease.
On a steamy summer night, the burger was fire. Loved the brown paper bag delivery — made it feel like a grab bag mystery from a kindergarten birthday party. I was slightly disappointed I didn't get a new colorful #2 pencil, though. Classic kindergarten gift.
Honestly, you could put a cardboard veggie burger on a pretzel bun, and I'd still be happy.
Must say my patties (yes, plural) were cattywompus, making mouth delivery a challenge at times. But once it hit the lips… yeah buddy.
